Coconut Waffles & Vogue

I can't sleep. It's 11:15 pm (i know, a little too early to complain about sleeping problems but in my standards, already pretty late). I'm planning to wake up at 5 am tomorrow but not sure how to survive only six hours of sleep. People who know me well know that I love to sleep anytime and anywhere. But who knows, maybe morning yoga will help keep me awake.

I did beginner's yoga today by myself on my little mat and it was very interesting. I actually searched youtube, found a decent female instructor (soothing voice with a cool Irish-y accent) and voila! i was on my way to becoming a yogi. well, sort of. I did basic yoga poses which i have to admit was a little hard at first because of all the stretching and balancing involved. I bought a hot pink yoga mat a few years back and never got the chance to use it except today so that thought kept me motivated to endure all the hard work. Actually, that pink mat made me realize how easily I make resolutions but take forever to fulfill them. I bought it with a promise I would use them ASAP. But whatever happened to that?

Now going back to my morning with yoga, I have to admit, it really did wonders to my mood, posture and thinking. I didn't expect to feel the calming effects so soon considering it was just my first time and I only did it for a good 10 minutes. But man I swear, it really felt like an hour. Thank God for it though because I felt more revived, calm and focused. I plan to do it every morning (hence, the 5 am alarm) and accompany it with a decent hearty breakfast. Yum. Let's see how far I can go with that schedule.

So anyway, aside from having a really calm and fulfilling morning, Paulo and I went to Church today too. I always love to do things that enrich my faith. Praying, meditating and just being silent. I love how they keep me grounded and focused on the more important things in life like family, friends, faith, love and inner peace.

Lately I've been a little lazy and have been internet bingeing (does the term even exist?). I read somewhere that sometimes you really have to take a break from all these things. Facebook, email, twitter, blogs, etc. I've been planning to do this whole internet detox thing I read in an article on the January issue of ELLE. Like staying away from the computer for a whole week. Even just thinking about not going online sends shivers down me spine. It'll will definitely make me feel naked and incomplete. No emails, no web surfing, blog readings and just jared, for a week. I have no idea how it's going to end up. First of all, work requires it. And….ok, let's say I just check my email once or twice a day. Hmmm…that sounds doable. :) Maybe I can do that starting tomorrow. But then something comes to mind. How about the blogs I've been waiting updates on?!?! Yes, i know, what a dilemma.

But maybe what I really need to do is to learn to let go. Let go of all these things I want to do and want to be. Just get rid of my infinite to do list that I tell myself I have to complete in order to be happy. Sometimes it gets too overwhelming. I want to learn so much and to be updated with everything happening around me but then I start to lose me, the REAL ME. I start to forget the things that really REALLY make me happy and the things that matter to me.

It is written. 2010 says I need to take a break from all my past habits of wanting to be everything to everyone. I will stop people pleasing and ass kissing. From now on, i have to learn to manage my time and prioritize, prioritize, prioritize. I should have a vision of what I want to accomplish and not just go with the flow all the time. This year I will focus on having direction. A main goal.

Whew, that was a little overwhelming but I guess it's time I get serious. I'm not getting any younger.

Now with all that said, i am reminded of an earlier dilemma. It's 12 am and I have to wake up in five hours to start all these good things. I'm not a bit sleepy but I will force my eyes shut after I publish this. Wish me luck.